Thursday, 23 August 2007

Shame about the thumb

I like many millions was fascinated by the story of the man who had his thumb surgically altered so that he could manage his new iPhone more easily.

Sadly it was a hoax.

http://www.newwest.net/index.php/city/article/the_great_thumb_surgery_hoax/C94/L94/


I have cancelled my op to have a USB port implanted in my left nostril.

Wednesday, 22 August 2007

All is revealed

The rail is to hold mountain-climbers on!

Can you see the cable?



But remember - no mountain bikes!





Don't panic!

Having escaped Hurricane Dean, the campus is now threatened by the "Historic Church Bike Ride". Some 30 people on bikes will pour onto the campus via the redway! The following message from Estates reasuures us that nobody will be affected and no special precautions are required, but do not drop your guard! We must "take care as usual when using the roadways and pathways"!

Please be advised that the following event will be taking place:

Unique ID No: OPS040

Short Title: Historic Churches Bike Ride

Type of event taking place: Historic Church Bike Ride x 30 people

Areas affected: Bike Riders will enter and leave the campus from the Redway behind the Church to register at the Church door

Date event commences: Saturday 8 September 2007 9.30am

Date of Completion: Saturday 8 September 2007 6pm

Date of Notice: Wednesday 22 August 2007

Who affected: None

Alternative arrangements: No alternative arrangements are required
Staff are reminded to take care as usual when using the roadways and pathways around the campus

Accessible Routes: All roads will be accessible
For further information and advice regarding alternative accessible routes please contact the Estates Liaison Line.

Specific health & safety precautions: None required

Details: We apologise for any inconvenience caused

Thursday, 9 August 2007

Off the rails



Young men are attaching these mystery rails along the top of every walkway.

What are they for?

a) MK is at last to get its planned monorail?
b) So that people with wheel chairs can insert their wheels in them?
c) A scenic model railway?
d) A safety attachment for the men who are attaching the rails?

Please add your suggestions.

Wednesday, 8 August 2007

Gimme shelter


Estates have pulled out all the stops to make sure that the minibus does not get wet. But what about the poor smokers standing in the rain in their little Green Square?

Thursday, 2 August 2007

Police want ‘Tesco jails’

We are checking with the Home office whether:

a) Inmates would qualify under the OU Prison Scheme, and

b) They would be able to pay with their Tesco vouchers.